Isaiah 1:25
I will raise my fist against you.
I will melt you down and skim off your slag.
I will remove all your impurities.
This verse touches me deeply. This is what has been going on in my life. As a walking dead woman, a sinner who had to yet to be forgiven, God's fist was raised against me. He could not see me nor hear me. Not until the night of March 15, 2008 when my heart cried out to Jesus and I confessed of my sins and asked for forgiveness and asked Jesus into my heart. Sins that had made a much of my life. A huge mess. A cleansing process began that night.
The first part of any cleansing process requires the removing of the grime. I had grime that had been caked to the walls of my heart for so long it would take a scraping process with some heavy duty cleaners aka the unconditional love of Jesus Christ, to even clean the surface. This process caused bleeding, peeling, chipping away of the original paint. Paint that must be removed because the impurities, my sins, were attached to it. It meant letting go of things, ideas, thoughts, activities, music, movies, even people in order to be truly cleansed.
Once the walls are bare, there is an empty canvas. New walls ready to be repainted, rebuilt, made new. I came out looking, feeling, entirely different. I am not the same person I was almost two years ago. It doesn't mean life is easier, but it is better. I am not constantly laden with guilt like I was. I know I am forgiven. I know there is no condemnation for me because I belong to Jesus Christ. (Romans 8:1)
As I cleared out, shared, tossed the sins and experiences of my meager life Saturday night I reflected on this and realized it doesn't matter what anyone thinks. All that matters is I am not condemned. I am a new person now that Christ is in me. I am transformed from the inside out. (Romans 8:1-4 & Romans 12:1-2)
Isn't it awesome to know that God loves us so much? He recognizes that we are too weak to follow the law of Moses and by His grace sent us the best gift we could ever receive. The blood of Jesus to cleanse us. To wash away our sins. I can't help but be grateful and in awe of how much God loves me as I think on all the sins I have done and yet He did not forsake me. When I asked, He forgave me. He forgot. Even as I continue to sin for I am one of the worst of sinners. He still forgives and forgets and for no other other reason except He loves me. God, my Father, loves me! It is I who can't seem to forgive myself. What makes me think I am greater than God that I cannot forgive myself? But God can and does! It is time I got over myself. Forgive myself and realize I am human and I will make mistakes. I ask God to guide me in my continuous healing as I anxiously await the day I get to see Jesus face to face.
A God who can send a hug through a little girl is a great God indeed. He is my God....my rock! He can do anything. He can move mountains. He can change hearts. He can do what I think is impossible such as show me that I am worthy to be loved especially by Him. God is so amazing and as I contemplate Isaiah 43:19 with an excited heart I cannot help but smile with the comfort that Jesus was and is and always will be by my side. He will never forsake me.
Isaiah 53:6
All of us like sheep, have strayed away.
We have left God's paths to follow our own.
Yet the Lord laid on him
the sins of us all.
If this isn't the greatest act of love, I don't know what is. Despite all my sin, despite straying from my Father, He still sent His son to die for my sins and cleanse me so that I may be new again. Born again. This is why I love Jesus so much. He saved me from the path of destruction I was running on and placed my feet upon a path toward the light! Jesus Christ!
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